It’s been a year now. I’m still angry, I’m still sad. They say it gets easier but I felt you so incredibly deeply that every cell is infected with you and the burn is unbearable. This kind of cleanse takes its sweet time healing.
You once said, “I love you so much you’ll never understand,” and I didn’t respond because my fear strangled me. Although my mind was screaming, begging me to tell you, I promise you I do understand, I just couldn’t speak the words.
To you, a year later, I will say, “I miss you so much you’ll never understand,” which you won’t because if you missed me as much as I miss you, your body would be numb the way mine is. Even with my hands cold and senses dulled, I still feel the day you left.